Last week I was part of a concert with Dozan wa Awtar. I mentioned in the last post that I would write about it soon. However, heiseheise did such a good job you can read his post and I'll add just a few notes. Heiseheise is just one of the many wonderful people I've gotten to know in the choir. It is an incredibly diverse group; from many countries and languages, and religions. About half are Jordanians, and during the concert I sang in between two awesome singers, one Filipino-American and one Iranian.
Oliver and Teddy Bear enjoyed our last concert, which was geared for children, and as Baby Bulb slept through the whole thing, Abu Tulip even got to enjoy the music as well.
You may wonder why in the world I would join a choir in the midst of having our third child. Well, as I mentioned last post, try to sing and be irritated at the same time. Yes, it is possible to convey anger in song, which we certainly did during portions of Zahret Almada'en. However, no matter how difficult a day I've had, singing instantaneously reduces my stress level. Baby Bulb joined us for rehearsals from the time he was 2 weeks old, and my fellow choir members adore him. Singing with Dozan wa Awtar has been such a joy for me and has certainly helped me get through the last month of pregnancy and first months with a newborn.
I'll finish with a few quotes I found online:
The only thing better than singing is more singing. ~ Ella Fitzgerald
And the night shall be filled with music,
And the cares that infest the day
Shall fold their tents like the Arabs
And as silently steal away.
~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, The Day Is Done
I don't' sing because I'm happy; I'm happy because I sing. ~William James
Music expresses that which cannot be said and on which it is impossible to be silent. ~Victor Hugo
The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing. Zephaniah 3:17
There is nothing in the world so much like prayer as music is. ~William P. Merrill
~ Um Tulip
Monday, April 13, 2009
Friday, April 10, 2009
The 5 S's plus 2
Baby Bulb is almost 2 months old now, so it's time for a baby update. He is growing like a weed, and is already in the 3 to 6 month size clothes. He's sleeping at night, usually up once or twice to feed, but has learned to get back to sleep rather quickly. His older brothers adore him, and Teddy Bear doesn't stop giving him kisses.
For those of you with little ones, here is something I found helpful. It's called the 5 S's, or 5 things that start with the letter S that help calm a newborn baby. Somebody named Dr. Harvey Karp wrote a book about it. I'll summarize.
Swaddle: this is wrapping a baby up tightly so he can't move his arms or wiggle much at all. I use an extra large receiving blanket, and literally wrap him up like he's 'waraq dawaali' or 'rolled grape leaves'. The idea is that babies are all scrunched up in the womb and they like to be wrapped up tight. This technique really helps him fall asleep.
Suck: personally, I'm an advocate for pacifiers. It's a lot easier to throw away a pacifier when he gets to be about two than it is to get rid of the thumb-sucking habit. You can't exactly throw away a thumb! Around 6 weeks is when my boys have started enjoying sucking on a pacifier. The calming effect works wonders. We use the nuk brand. Oliver called his pacifier a 'this-y' because I used to ask him, 'do you want this?' Teddy Bear called his pacifier a 'fire' as in the last syllable of the word. When we relegated the pacifier to the bed, he used to call for his 'fire, fire, fire' and it was quite comical. I wonder what Baby Bulb will call his.
Side: while babies should sleep on their backs to reduce the risk of SIDS, sometimes babies like to be on their sides or tummies. Often a change in position makes a big difference if a baby is fussy. Mine really enjoys tummy time, especially after a feeding. It helps him release some gas, and he's much more content after a few minutes on his tummy.
Shh: in almost any language saying 'shh' seems to mean 'be quiet'. By saying 'shhh' really loudly into your baby's ear, your baby will often calm down immediately. The theory is that a baby in the womb hears a sound similar to this. Variations of this technique include blowing a hair dryer or vacuuming nearby. I've heard stories of desperate parents tape-recording a vacuum and playing the tape near their baby to help him/her get to sleep. Playing the radio on static has a similar effect. We have a ocean sounds baby aquarium that plays music, waves, or basically white noise. Again, it works wonders!
Swing: the theory behind this one is that a swing simulates the motion of being in the womb. An electric swing is great, but often our little one likes being swung by mommy or daddy. Rocking, bouncing, and pacing all have a similar effect.
I've got two more to add, and I even came up with more S's. Singing! Baby Bulb has been attending choir rehearsals with me throughout the pregnancy and after being born. We just finished our marathon week of rehearsals and concerts and I hope to post about that later. In any event, babies love it when you sing to them. I think part of the reason it works is that if you are holding a fussy baby - especially one who just won't calm down - you are likely to be tense and irritated yourself. Try singing while you're irritated - it doesn't work. By singing, you relax yourself, and babies can sense tension.
The second one to add is this: Solo time. Leave your baby alone! A few nights ago Baby Bulb would not calm down. We'd tried all of the above, along with changing him, feeding him, etc., etc. My mother-in-law and I couldn't think of anything else to do, and were both tired and tense. Finally we put him in his bed, and left. He immediately calmed down and was content. Sometimes babies just get overstimulated. If you're a stressed out mom and feel overwhelmed, sometimes the best thing to do is just to set your baby down safely in his bed and take a break.
Also, congrats to the family of Babycue and Hondorp family on their new little ones. Happy parenting!
~ Um Tulip
For those of you with little ones, here is something I found helpful. It's called the 5 S's, or 5 things that start with the letter S that help calm a newborn baby. Somebody named Dr. Harvey Karp wrote a book about it. I'll summarize.
Swaddle: this is wrapping a baby up tightly so he can't move his arms or wiggle much at all. I use an extra large receiving blanket, and literally wrap him up like he's 'waraq dawaali' or 'rolled grape leaves'. The idea is that babies are all scrunched up in the womb and they like to be wrapped up tight. This technique really helps him fall asleep.
Suck: personally, I'm an advocate for pacifiers. It's a lot easier to throw away a pacifier when he gets to be about two than it is to get rid of the thumb-sucking habit. You can't exactly throw away a thumb! Around 6 weeks is when my boys have started enjoying sucking on a pacifier. The calming effect works wonders. We use the nuk brand. Oliver called his pacifier a 'this-y' because I used to ask him, 'do you want this?' Teddy Bear called his pacifier a 'fire' as in the last syllable of the word. When we relegated the pacifier to the bed, he used to call for his 'fire, fire, fire' and it was quite comical. I wonder what Baby Bulb will call his.
Side: while babies should sleep on their backs to reduce the risk of SIDS, sometimes babies like to be on their sides or tummies. Often a change in position makes a big difference if a baby is fussy. Mine really enjoys tummy time, especially after a feeding. It helps him release some gas, and he's much more content after a few minutes on his tummy.
Shh: in almost any language saying 'shh' seems to mean 'be quiet'. By saying 'shhh' really loudly into your baby's ear, your baby will often calm down immediately. The theory is that a baby in the womb hears a sound similar to this. Variations of this technique include blowing a hair dryer or vacuuming nearby. I've heard stories of desperate parents tape-recording a vacuum and playing the tape near their baby to help him/her get to sleep. Playing the radio on static has a similar effect. We have a ocean sounds baby aquarium that plays music, waves, or basically white noise. Again, it works wonders!
Swing: the theory behind this one is that a swing simulates the motion of being in the womb. An electric swing is great, but often our little one likes being swung by mommy or daddy. Rocking, bouncing, and pacing all have a similar effect.
I've got two more to add, and I even came up with more S's. Singing! Baby Bulb has been attending choir rehearsals with me throughout the pregnancy and after being born. We just finished our marathon week of rehearsals and concerts and I hope to post about that later. In any event, babies love it when you sing to them. I think part of the reason it works is that if you are holding a fussy baby - especially one who just won't calm down - you are likely to be tense and irritated yourself. Try singing while you're irritated - it doesn't work. By singing, you relax yourself, and babies can sense tension.
The second one to add is this: Solo time. Leave your baby alone! A few nights ago Baby Bulb would not calm down. We'd tried all of the above, along with changing him, feeding him, etc., etc. My mother-in-law and I couldn't think of anything else to do, and were both tired and tense. Finally we put him in his bed, and left. He immediately calmed down and was content. Sometimes babies just get overstimulated. If you're a stressed out mom and feel overwhelmed, sometimes the best thing to do is just to set your baby down safely in his bed and take a break.
Also, congrats to the family of Babycue and Hondorp family on their new little ones. Happy parenting!
~ Um Tulip
Sunday, April 5, 2009
Birthday Party Crashers
Last week we did Teddy Bear's birthday party. He turned 3 a few weeks back, and we waited for grandma to arrive from America to throw the party. I let him choose the guest list, which included about half of his nursery school and some neighborhood friends as well. It was monkey themed, with Curious George plates and fruit snacks, and a homemade monkey cake. I also made jello for the kids, which was a big hit. I used 6 packets of jello, and between 20-25 clear cups. Two days before the party I did the first layer of jello, one day before the party another layer, and the day of we topped the cups with whipped cream (dream whip is what is available here).
We had kids, moms, dads, chaos, and fun. The weather was colder than I thought it would be so we were mostly inside, but the sun came out for a while. Teddy Bear was thrilled and grinned ear the whole time. Abu Tulip read a Curious George story to the kids, and we sent the children home happy and sugar buzzed.Today we decided to take the kids to funtastic. With Abu Tulip away for work, grandma and I wanted to do something fun with the boys. Oliver has been begging to return to funtastic ever since Twinbean's birthday there. What we didn't realize is that there was a birthday party going on already. The host invited us to join and we had quite a party. Along with all the great educational activities at the place, they had hired magician to come to a show, and brought food and cake to feed three birthday parties. The magician had a two live rabbits, a snake, and a turtle, along with the usual tricks up his sleeve. The kids were thrilled. They also dressed up as batman and spiderman and danced for the video camera. The kids even received party favors, too. We thanked the birthday boy's family numerous times, and they were so gracious.
We're home now and exhausted. Time for a Dora movie for the kids and some down -time for us! Gotta love Arab hospitality. Maybe we'll crash a birthday party again next week...~ Um Tulip
Thursday, March 26, 2009
You know you're raising your kids overseas when...
This came from a friend of a friend. I edited it a bit...
You know you’re raising kids overseas when:
1. Your children don’t know your brothers or sisters, but they have at least 50 Uncles and Aunts who are no relation to them at all.
2. When you say, “We’re going home,” your kids ask, “Which one?”
3. Your kids can translate between American, British, and Australian English.
4. It’s 27 C outside, but your kids want a jacket.
5. Hundreds of total strangers have photos of your children on their mobile phone.
6. When you’re in a restaurant and the server doesn’t try to pick up your toddler and carry him around, you’re surprised - and disappointed since now you have to watch him.
7. Your kids prefer nutella to peanut butter and jelly.
8. Your kids flew before they could walk.
9. Your kids can greet strangers appropriately in multiple languages and cultures, but they’re not sure how to relate to their cousins.
10. One of the first phrases you learn to say in your target language is, “Can you put that onto 2 plates?”
11. You wish strollers came in 4-wheel drive models.
12. You know that the best toys are twigs, rocks, and cardboard boxes.
13. Finding your children in a crowd is easy: they’re at the center of it.
14. Your kids think change is normal and normal is boring.
15. You teach geography by saying, “And Uncle John lives there, and the Johnsons are from there…”
16. The thought of sending your children on an unescorted plane trip doesn’t scare you nearly as bad as putting them back into your home country’s school system.
17. You realize one day that your definition of “home” isn’t even on the same continent as your children’s definition.
My favorite is definately #5. Just today our boys were photographed on somebody's mobile at a coffee shop. I could add a few regarding living in the Middle East, and just our experience in general.
1. Your kids love to eat leban (yogurt) and rice but don't really know about yogurt with fruit.
2. Your kids have ridden camels more times than they have played with pet dogs.
3. Your kids can fall asleep at night even with fireworks and loud music outside due to tawjihi score results being announced or an engagement party.
4. They go to a McDonalds in America and are confused because there is no play area.
5. Your kids recognize several flags.
6. You had to get new pages in your child's passport before he turned five.
7. You agree with your friends that your child is sick because the weather is cold and not because he was sneezed on by another sick child. Akiid, min ijjaw.
8. You put your children to bed at 9 pm and your neighbor marvels at how early it is. Bakiir!
9. Your children are surprised at the feel of grass on their feet, and love the sand.
I'm sure I could think of more but my sleep-deprived brain has ceased to function. Please add to the list! ~ Um Tulip
You know you’re raising kids overseas when:
1. Your children don’t know your brothers or sisters, but they have at least 50 Uncles and Aunts who are no relation to them at all.
2. When you say, “We’re going home,” your kids ask, “Which one?”
3. Your kids can translate between American, British, and Australian English.
4. It’s 27 C outside, but your kids want a jacket.
5. Hundreds of total strangers have photos of your children on their mobile phone.
6. When you’re in a restaurant and the server doesn’t try to pick up your toddler and carry him around, you’re surprised - and disappointed since now you have to watch him.
7. Your kids prefer nutella to peanut butter and jelly.
8. Your kids flew before they could walk.
9. Your kids can greet strangers appropriately in multiple languages and cultures, but they’re not sure how to relate to their cousins.
10. One of the first phrases you learn to say in your target language is, “Can you put that onto 2 plates?”
11. You wish strollers came in 4-wheel drive models.
12. You know that the best toys are twigs, rocks, and cardboard boxes.
13. Finding your children in a crowd is easy: they’re at the center of it.
14. Your kids think change is normal and normal is boring.
15. You teach geography by saying, “And Uncle John lives there, and the Johnsons are from there…”
16. The thought of sending your children on an unescorted plane trip doesn’t scare you nearly as bad as putting them back into your home country’s school system.
17. You realize one day that your definition of “home” isn’t even on the same continent as your children’s definition.
My favorite is definately #5. Just today our boys were photographed on somebody's mobile at a coffee shop. I could add a few regarding living in the Middle East, and just our experience in general.
1. Your kids love to eat leban (yogurt) and rice but don't really know about yogurt with fruit.
2. Your kids have ridden camels more times than they have played with pet dogs.
3. Your kids can fall asleep at night even with fireworks and loud music outside due to tawjihi score results being announced or an engagement party.
4. They go to a McDonalds in America and are confused because there is no play area.
5. Your kids recognize several flags.
6. You had to get new pages in your child's passport before he turned five.
7. You agree with your friends that your child is sick because the weather is cold and not because he was sneezed on by another sick child. Akiid, min ijjaw.
8. You put your children to bed at 9 pm and your neighbor marvels at how early it is. Bakiir!
9. Your children are surprised at the feel of grass on their feet, and love the sand.
I'm sure I could think of more but my sleep-deprived brain has ceased to function. Please add to the list! ~ Um Tulip
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Dissent Not Allowed
Last week, some little-known events transpired which I think reveal a lot about the politics between the US and Middle East.
Charles Freeman, former ambassador to Saudi Arabia and president of the Middle East Policy council was a few weeks ago picked by a top Obama advisor to chair the National Intelligence Council. He was not picked directly by President Obama, but certainly with his approval.
Now, a little background on Mr. Freeman. He has been a voice questioning America's unquestioning support of Israel, urging policy-makers to look at all sides of the situation. He has been critical of the "Israel lobby" in Washington--those who take it upon themselves to ensure that Israel's interests become equated with America's interests in the minds of those who make policy. Read more here.
Basically what happened is that enough commentators and even elected representatives (like Senator Schumer of New York) complained so that Freeman was pressured into removing himself from consideration. Apparently Freeman was disqualified for his "extremist views"--that he is willing to criticize our policy of support for Israel is considered extremist. One commentator says about the efforts to marginalize Freeman:
I'm impressed that the Obama administration is willing to appoint someone like Freeman as an advisor to the president's foreign policy. Considering the lack of success in foreign policy we've seen recently, it seems some diversity in viewpoints is needed. Particularly on the Israel issue. However, it's very discouraging that others would pressure this man out, and the administration wouldn't be able to stick with him. Many people here were hopeful that Obama's election would bring some change in America's stance regarding Israel/Palestine. Rahm Emanuel's selection as chief of staff took a little of the wind out of their sails. The fact that Obama was open to Freeman's ideas shows he has some good intentions, but I'm afraid there is still a long way to go before American policy can be more even-handed in expressing our ideal that "all are endowed by their creator with certain inalienable rights, among this are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness."
-Abu Tulip
Charles Freeman, former ambassador to Saudi Arabia and president of the Middle East Policy council was a few weeks ago picked by a top Obama advisor to chair the National Intelligence Council. He was not picked directly by President Obama, but certainly with his approval.
Now, a little background on Mr. Freeman. He has been a voice questioning America's unquestioning support of Israel, urging policy-makers to look at all sides of the situation. He has been critical of the "Israel lobby" in Washington--those who take it upon themselves to ensure that Israel's interests become equated with America's interests in the minds of those who make policy. Read more here.
Basically what happened is that enough commentators and even elected representatives (like Senator Schumer of New York) complained so that Freeman was pressured into removing himself from consideration. Apparently Freeman was disqualified for his "extremist views"--that he is willing to criticize our policy of support for Israel is considered extremist. One commentator says about the efforts to marginalize Freeman:
Another writes:The real rub, the basis of the whole controversy, however, is that [Freeman] has been far more critical of Israeli policy than is generally allowed within acceptable debate in Washington. . .
The whole effort strikes me as little more than a thuggish effort to keep the already too-constricted terms of debate over the Middle East and Israel/Palestine locked down and largely one-sided. . . . But the gist is that campaigns like this are ugly and should be resisted. Not just on general principles, but because the country needs more diversity of viewpoints on this issue right now.
The idea that Obama should not have advisers who challenge some of the core assumptions of the Bush years, especially with respect to Israel-Palestine, seems nuts to me. And the impulse to blackball and smear someone as a bigot is reprehensible.
-Abu Tulip
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Yes, there are honest people out there
Over the weekend we decided to take a trip to the Dead Sea. Baby bulb is three weeks old, and the older boys were itching with cabin fever, so we decided a day trip was in the works. We had a good time at Amman Tourist Beach last fall, so we returned. It was a great day. We went with friends Z and F, which guaranteed playmates for our boys and good conversation! Admission for residents is 8 JD, and 4 JD for kids over four. When we arrived the swimming pools were being cleaned. This was a relief as last summer we went to the Day Spa and ended up with pink eye from the pools (as have other friends). This beach is much simpler than the five-star hotels up the road, but we still had a great time and stayed within our budget. The pool has a good size shallow area for the kids, and they had a blast. They also built sandcastles. I also took Oliver and Teddy Bear into the Dead Sea for a little bit (just up to their knees). This was their first time in the salty water.
The weather was amazing. Plenty warm to swim, but not so hot for me and baby bulb (as we were not swimming and he's still feeding every couple hours). We ate at their buffet, as they allowed us to bring in water and a few snacks for the kids, but not lunch. The only place you can do that is at the public beach or the 'shatt ilhurra'. Included in their buffet was plain rice, plain noodles, plain yogurt, and cucumbers without any dressing. Yes, my children ate! We enjoyed fish, oozi rice with chicken, stuffed lamb, and a variety of salads. The kids had jello for dessert and we had 'um 3ali' or Arab bread pudding.
We got back to our house with only an hour to bathe and get ready for church. Our service is in the evening as many people work Sunday mornings. When we got to the car, already running late, Abu Tulip and I both realized we did not have our mobile phones. He ran back in the house to look for his, and we both started to panic. We had put our phones inside our camera case (with the digital camera) to keep them safe while we were at the Dead Sea. They were no where to be found. With no way to contact our friends, we headed for church.
BTW, Z and F attend our church. As soon as we arrived (half-way through the worship) I asked my friend, who was with the kids in the nursery, if she had accidentally packed our camera case in her pack. With the chaos of packing up all of our belongings, and trying to prevent five kids from wandering back into the pool fully-clothed, anything is possible. She hadn't seen it so she gave my phone a call. Someone answered! "Hello, is this Abu and Um Tulip?" "No, this is their friend. Who are you?" "An employee of the Amman Touristic Beach. Did you lose your phone?" "Yes, two phones, and a camera." Thankfully, this employee was heading back to Amman, where he lives, and was willing to bring our belongings back. "nkuun mamnuuniin" my friend said, "we would be grateful".
So, after the service, I went back with F to her house with the kids for falaafil while Abu Tulip and Z met the man carrying our belongings. After a bit, Z calls. I see the look of horror on F's face and start to worry. "miitayn dinaar? hakayt ma3 isshurti? raayih al ATM?" "200 JD? did you talk to the police? you're going to an ATM?" Then laughter. "biddu ilcarseat kamaan?" "he wants the carseat, too?" More laughter. My dear husband had cooked up a plan with Z to fool us into thinking the employee had demanded 200 JD for our phones and camera. They really had us fooled for a few minutes. I guess that's what you get for leaving your husbands on their own for a while!
Needless to say, we had a good laugh afterwards. We are so thankful that the employee (who turned out to be a manager) was honest and brought back our phones and camera. He was extremely gracious, and renewed our faith in the honesty of people yet again. We arrived home much later than usual, and Abu Tulip had to carry all three kids in from the car to the home as they were quite sleepy.
Another day finished, another story to share. ~ Um Tulip
The weather was amazing. Plenty warm to swim, but not so hot for me and baby bulb (as we were not swimming and he's still feeding every couple hours). We ate at their buffet, as they allowed us to bring in water and a few snacks for the kids, but not lunch. The only place you can do that is at the public beach or the 'shatt ilhurra'. Included in their buffet was plain rice, plain noodles, plain yogurt, and cucumbers without any dressing. Yes, my children ate! We enjoyed fish, oozi rice with chicken, stuffed lamb, and a variety of salads. The kids had jello for dessert and we had 'um 3ali' or Arab bread pudding.
We got back to our house with only an hour to bathe and get ready for church. Our service is in the evening as many people work Sunday mornings. When we got to the car, already running late, Abu Tulip and I both realized we did not have our mobile phones. He ran back in the house to look for his, and we both started to panic. We had put our phones inside our camera case (with the digital camera) to keep them safe while we were at the Dead Sea. They were no where to be found. With no way to contact our friends, we headed for church.
BTW, Z and F attend our church. As soon as we arrived (half-way through the worship) I asked my friend, who was with the kids in the nursery, if she had accidentally packed our camera case in her pack. With the chaos of packing up all of our belongings, and trying to prevent five kids from wandering back into the pool fully-clothed, anything is possible. She hadn't seen it so she gave my phone a call. Someone answered! "Hello, is this Abu and Um Tulip?" "No, this is their friend. Who are you?" "An employee of the Amman Touristic Beach. Did you lose your phone?" "Yes, two phones, and a camera." Thankfully, this employee was heading back to Amman, where he lives, and was willing to bring our belongings back. "nkuun mamnuuniin" my friend said, "we would be grateful".
So, after the service, I went back with F to her house with the kids for falaafil while Abu Tulip and Z met the man carrying our belongings. After a bit, Z calls. I see the look of horror on F's face and start to worry. "miitayn dinaar? hakayt ma3 isshurti? raayih al ATM?" "200 JD? did you talk to the police? you're going to an ATM?" Then laughter. "biddu ilcarseat kamaan?" "he wants the carseat, too?" More laughter. My dear husband had cooked up a plan with Z to fool us into thinking the employee had demanded 200 JD for our phones and camera. They really had us fooled for a few minutes. I guess that's what you get for leaving your husbands on their own for a while!
Needless to say, we had a good laugh afterwards. We are so thankful that the employee (who turned out to be a manager) was honest and brought back our phones and camera. He was extremely gracious, and renewed our faith in the honesty of people yet again. We arrived home much later than usual, and Abu Tulip had to carry all three kids in from the car to the home as they were quite sleepy.
Another day finished, another story to share. ~ Um Tulip
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)